Sometimes there are times like these. 

 Or years like these. When not that much seem to be going right. I search the soul till it hurts, trying to see what I can’t see yet, and still come empty.

When the frustration boils over too far, I have a solution – “Go Outside”. “Go to that tree”. "Notice its strength devoid of any pretense".

I try to notice its invisible roots that draw energy from the earth. I notice its' dropped needles that give the nourishment back. Don’t analyze, don’t pretend to understand. Just the feel that strength. It’s not infallible, the tree next to this one is laying down. Transforming into nourishment for others.

When I look at Mothers, I see the same. It can be a young girl in a grocery store, overwhelmed by her three rambunctious kids. But underneath that there is a resolve, there is continuance that she has and gives, putting them to bed, reminding them to pick up the socks. It’s not even important how great or how imperfect the mothers are as they are all human. It’s the place they hold giving life, giving strength, providing lessons whichever way, on what to do or not.

My Mom is 88 y.o. and unexpectedly I am being shared the greatest lessons of all. She is fighting the big C, stage IV. It is the stage where doctors are mostly interested in “comfort” not cure. Mom in her very imperfect English is teaching all of us different. She is successfully conquering her diagnosis so far and leading us with an incredible lesson of determination and will.

In my heart I know that last year has given our family more than it took, the platform to come together in strength, compassion, and empathy. It’s another huge gift from Mom.

I understand that Aspens trees are not individual organisms but a community connected by root and a genetic signature system. Some say that it’s one of the oldest living organisms surviving incomprehensive span of over 80,000 years. They pass the nutrients to their community even when wiped out from Earth surface and return again and again to nourish life.

Maybe that’s why being between the trees feels so good. It offers unspoken answers of how to love our human family and how to share the strength and connection. How to honor our roots.